Chardonnay is the lady who’s seen it all. She’s been dressed up and stripped down, revered and reviled, but at her core she’s pretty simple and just wants to be loved.

From the “cougar juice” crowd to the “ABC” (Anything But Chardonnay) mob, Chardonnay has been stretched and twisted to the limits of—and sometimes beyond—what it can take. And to be fair, Chardonnay is one of the hardiest white grapes out there: it can take on massive amounts of new oak, a special extra fermentation usually reserved only for red grapes, a thousand different soil types and climates, and in rare circumstances when all the right factors come together, it can last a lifetime. But what’s really at the heart of this ubiquitous grape?

There was a time in our not-so-distant past when “Chardonnay” was synonymous with “white wine.” If you were a white wine drinker, there was hardly any other choice! (Thanks, Australia.) Most people didn’t associate the word with the particular grape variety or a place or style—they just knew they liked it. Starting in the 1970s and catapulting its way through the millennium, Chardonnay became not just a popular wine, but also a brand. But with time, changing fashions, and a growing awareness of what was in people’s glasses, Chardonnay’s lofty pedestal slowly began to crumble. Sometimes pop culture was the culprit—remember Bridget Jones’ Diary? That movie had the same effect on Chardonnay in Britain that Sideways had on Merlot in the U.S. Other times it was just that Chardonnay had grown too big for its britches, and the masses simply began to grow tired of its big, boozy, buttery, and rather one-noted nature.

In all reality, Chardonnay has a thousand different faces. Do you like white Burgundy? Can’t get enough of Champagne? Enjoy the eye-popping acidity of fresh, crispy Chablis? Then give it up for Chardonnay—the grape that looks good in anything.

Structurally, Chardonnay is pretty ordinary all the way through. It has medium acidity, medium alcohol, a medium body… it’s just so basic, as the kids say. But that is exactly what makes it so unique! It’s one of the most malleable, flexible, and easiest-to-grow grapes that winemakers have to work with. It very easily takes on the characteristics of where it’s grown, as well as the winemaking choices the vintner puts on it. If soil, climate, elevation, malolactic fermentation, wood aging, and lees stirring are the colors to use (just to name a few important components and techniques for making wine), then Chardonnay is the canvas itself. It’s a blank page, ready to take on the whims and fancies of whoever works with it. This is exactly the reason why some people hate it, some love it, and some have their mouths hanging wide open as they ask, “This is Chardonnay?!” As the illustrious English wine writer Jancis Robinson stated, Chardonnay is “equally capable of extreme mediocrity and regal splendour.”

So grab your glasses, your fruit bowl, and a group of your most stubborn friends. We’re going to peel off the layers of this grape and really get to know the “real Chardonnay.” This is the perfect grape to deconstruct! Read on to dig into the three stars of this show.

By all rights, Cabernet Sauvignon probably shouldn’t exist. Every time cross-pollination happens (in this particular case it was Cabernet Franc and Sauvignon Blanc), the DNA gets twisted around in a plethora of different sequences. Basically, a Cabernet Franc vine happened to be planted near a Sauvignon Blanc vine. The wind carried pollen from one vine onto the budding flowers of the other, and the result was a vine full of berries, each with its own particular genetic structure showing dominant or recessive characteristics of each parent. Of course, we need our hero, Cabernet Sauvignon, to survive so we can go on singing its praises today, so what happened? Most likely, a bird flew by and from the hundreds of grapes available, chose to eat the magic Cabernet Sauvignon berry. He pooped out the seeds, a brand new vine grew, a farmer made wine from those grapes and thought it was tasty… and the rest is history! (Makes you wonder what other genetic sequences were possible, doesn’t it?) Fate? Coincidence? Blessing from the gods? Yep.

Climate is one of the biggest factors in how any wine tastes. If you’re drinking Cabernet from a warm climate like Napa or Australia, you’re going to get oodles of juicy, ripe fruit on the nose and palate. If you’re drinking one from a cooler climate like Chile or maybe Bordeaux, you’ll notice many other things that aren’t fruit—things like graphite, pencil shavings, or green bell pepper. The truth is that Cab is a thick-skinned son of a gun who likes to take its sweet time ripening. The shorter the growing season is and the less warmth and sun it gets, the less time it has to develop those luscious fruit flavors and aromas we’ve come to expect out of a lot of New World Cabs. Using the following three wines, you’ll get an idea of how the climate factor plays into how the wine tastes. Let the games begin!

Wine #1: Robert Mondavi Napa Valley Cabernet Sauvignon—Napa Valley, California

SIGHT: This New World classic has a vibrant, deep ruby color; and if you look closely, the rim will have a youthful purplish hue to it. If you compare the color here to your other two wines, wines 2 and 3 seem almost dull in comparison. A swirl of the glass will show a few thick, stained legs dripping down the side of your glass.

SMELL: Get out your spice rack and fruit basket! This juicy Cab is packed to the max with candied cherry, plum, black cherry, and a slightly raisinated grapey aroma. Check your spices to see if you find notes of allspice, fennel, tarragon leaf, clove, or caraway seed as well. And is it just me, or does anyone else get a familiar whiff of Perkins’ blueberry pancake syrup…?

TASTE: Flavors of sweet red and black fruits dominate here, along with a hint of tart cranberry concentrate.  The structure of a wine is divided up into the following components: body (how thick or thin a wine feels on your tongue), tannin (the drying feeling present on your tongue, cheeks and gums), acidity (presents itself as tartness, a mouthwatering sensation, or sometimes a grippiness in your gums), and alcohol (usually a warming sensation in the back of your throat after you swallow). In this wine, we find a medium-full body, medium acidity, medium full alcohol, and probably only medium/medium-full tannins that seem to melt away pretty quickly.

Owing to the huge presence of ripe fruit notes and a nice big, round mouthfeel, we can safely say this Cabernet is a perfect example of a New World style coming from a warm climate. Old Man Mondavi would be proud!

Wine #2: Boschkloof Cabernet Sauvignon—Stellenbosch, South Africa

SIGHT: As noted before, this wine’s color is a bit more muted and red-toned than our Mondavi was. This could be classified as having a deep ruby color with more of a garnet tinge at the rim. There’s still a fair bit of staining on the glass when you swirl it, but not quite as pronounced as the Mondavi.

SMELL: This is a great wine to contrast against our first one! There are definitely still notes of black cherry and cassis, but see if you can pick out those non-fruit aromas of smoked meat, charcoal, old cracked leather, tar, black pepper, nutmeg, and eucalyptus. I even checked my dirtiest pair of socks in my laundry basket, and yep—smells familiar! (In the best way possible, of course…)

TASTE: Many of our aromas carry through to the palate, including that beautiful charred meat quality and some dark berry hints—maybe blackberry or bramble. A smoky note in the background adds further complexity, with a gentle mineral element providing lift on the finish. We’ll say that this wine has a medium body—a little lighter than the Mondavi—but firmer, stronger tannins and higher acidity. Whereas the Mondavi sits heavy on your tongue after you swallow, the Boschkloof clears out pretty quickly. The fruit quality is still ripe, but it’s definitely less sweet than the Mondavi. A sharp baking spice note comes through on the finish.

Stellenbosch is the Bordeaux of South Africa. This highly revered mountainous region just off of False Bay gets cooling breezes and plenty of sunshine to grow ripe yet balanced Cabernet. Although still hefty at 14.5% alcohol, the higher acidity present in this Cab makes it a little more balanced than the Mondavi. South Africa is also known for a particular shrubby, scraggly bush called fynbos, which, some may say, adds a peculiar herbal quality that only South African wines seem to have.

Wine #3: Chateau La Croix St Estephe—Bordeaux, France

SIGHT: This wine has a deep ruby color to it—almost black—but the rim fades to that same soft garnet shade that we saw in the last wine. The legs carry much less staining with them compared to the first two wines—a huge hint to where this wine comes from!

SMELL: If the first thing you smell is fruit in this wine, you’ve most likely switched it up with the Mondavi! This is a perfect wine to explain what secondary aromas are: basically, they’re everything you smell other than fruit. Savory elements of cured meat, cedar and maybe some tarragon and fennel peek shyly out of the glass: this is a pretty closed-up wine that doesn’t announce its presence like the others do. You could also catch some floral notes floating around; perhaps some dried violet or rose petals.

TASTE: We’ve found the fruit! It’s there on the palate, hiding behind all those secondary aromas. Just-barely-ripe notes of blackberry and black cherry come through on your tongue, framed by a slight savory meatiness and a delicate herbal quality. This wine has firm tannins that linger through to the finish and a slightly fuller-than-normal body, probably due to some significant barrel aging. It has medium acidity and medium alcohol, ringing in at only 13% ABV. The absence of staining on the glass is a clue to the fact that this wine came from a cooler climate than Napa or South Africa. This hinders the grape skins from developing deeper flavor and color compounds than they would in warmer climates.

This wine is built for the long haul! If you’re willing to wait another 3-5 years (or more), those baby-fat tannins will soften and more secondary and even tertiary aromas (“aged” aromas) will blossom. This is a fantastic example of well-made Bordeaux that won’t leave a gaping hole in your pocketbook. It’s also the only one of our group that isn’t a straight Cabernet: the complete blend is 61% Cabernet Sauvignon, 22% Merlot, and 17% Cabernet Franc. Seeing as all three grapes come from the same genetic family (the “Carmenet” ampelographic group), it’s pretty natural that they fit so well together in blends.

If you’ve made it all the way through, you definitely deserve (another) glass of wine—or maybe a beer, at this point. We’ll keep discussing the structural components of wine, which is one of the most important things to be able to talk about when describing what you like (or don’t like) in wine. At the very least, hopefully you’ve discovered how variable even a world-famous grape like Cabernet can be. Three cheers for The Grape That Shouldn’t Have Been: Cabernet Sauvignon!

Rule #1: There are no rules.

By this I mean, there are absolutely no set standards for what you “should” be smelling or tasting in a wine. If you smell rose petals but your friend thinks you’re crazy because clearly it’s tomato leaf, you’re both right. Is it cherry or strawberry in that Pinot Noir? The answer is: yes.

Sure, there’s a lot of science behind what goes into wine, but part of what makes wine so fun is that it allows for a very subjective, personal experience. Because none of us have the same set of smell and taste memories, none of us will come at a wine in exactly the same way. If you have a group of people you taste wine regularly with, it’s natural that your palates will calibrate and you’ll be able to use similar descriptors. But nothing can take away from your personal experience with the wine. You’ve got one perspective to work with, and it’s a valuable one.

The easiest way to get into describing wine is to connect what’s in your glass to tangible things in your world: the things you eat and cook with, the smells you encounter everyday, and all those little sensory details you normally don’t give much thought to are all essential parts of your personal memory bank. If you go into describing your Cabernet saying, “It smells like wine,” well… you’re not wrong, but now it’s time to go beyond that initial impression and see how many layers you can uncover. See if you can get any of the vanillin aromas that come when you bake cookies. Is there any smokiness that’s reminiscent of the bonfire you had last weekend? Is that lemony scent closer to the fresh lemon you sliced up for your ice water, or to the Mr. Clean dish soap you use? These are the questions that will heighten your sensory awareness, and make your normal glass of wine much more interesting than you ever gave it credit for.

That being said, we need to train your schnozz! This is where your spice rack will come in handy—you’ll definitely need that available for every wine you deconstruct. When you’re first starting out, you’ll literally have to methodically go through each spice you have (even the ones that don’t make any sense), giving each one a sniff and then going to your wine to see if that smell is also in your glass. Sounds tedious, but it won’t take long for your brain to recognize the aromas outright instead of having to be reminded by the real thing.

And since there are more than just spices in a wine, you’ll also benefit from having a few fresh fruits and veggies on hand. Blueberries, blackberries, cherries, apples, pears, citrus fruits, as well as any kind of jams, preserves or fruit juices will be very helpful in getting to know your wine. (And as I type this, I’m realizing that I can knock out two potential New Years’ Resolutions with one stone: eat healthier, and learn wine! Hmmm…)

But why stop there? Everything in your personal environment, from your dirty laundry to your wet dog to your old baseball glove, is important sensory information. If something in your wine reminds you of a specific smell or flavor, go dig it out and see if you’re right!

Finally, there are many of us that have particular affinities or aversions towards certain fruits, spices, aromas or flavors that are completely unrelated to the wine in front of you. For the sake of education and expanding your horizons, it’s best if you can forget the fact that you loathe blueberries or detest the smell of fennel for the time being. Go in with a blank slate, and take the wine as it is. After you’ve learned all about it, then you can decide whether you like it or not.

On to the star of this particular show: Cabernet Sauvignon is the first grape that we’ll dig into. By the end of this session, you’ll know the grape inside out, understand its unique qualities, and realize that it’s more than just a big, boozy red (which, don’t get me wrong, it very often is). But did you know that Cab Sauv is actually a fairly new grape in the history of winemaking? Most accounts say that winemakers in Bordeaux only started planting it regularly by the late 18^th century… only a few decades before it made its debut in California! So what’s the real story behind this rock star grape? Read on, and use your nose and tongue to find out for yourself.